Have you ever gone to someone and shared an idea that you’re trying to justify in your own mind? If you’re like me, you share this idea for a couple of reasons. One, to make yourself feel better about your (potentially selfish) idea and two, to get some feedback. But if you’re honest, you really just want to be validated. It might be hard for you to recall an instance like this, so I’ll just share my story.
A couple of weeks ago, Riley and I began realizing that a season of transition is quickly approaching. We are coming up on Riley’s graduation and are beginning to make some ‘next step’ decisions. While conversations about job opportunities and career choices were becoming more frequent, the possibility of leaving Kansas City and moving somewhere new wasn’t even on my radar. For about a week, I grappled with the idea of leaving Kansas City and therefore, giving up a job I really love.
That same week, I went to dinner with my mom and got the opportunity to talk to her about how I was feeling. I told her I loved my job and was feeling hesitant to give it up for a number of reasons. What if I can’t find a job at another nonprofit organization? What If I still lack the experience people are looking for? What if, what if, what if? My mom took a moment to share with me her experience of moving around as my dad made career changes throughout their marriage. She told me that before each time they moved, she absolutely loved her job. She had so many reasons she didn’t want to give them up. But, each time she was willing to let them go, God provided her with opportunities even better than before. She challenged me not to hold on so tightly to what God has blessed me with in this job, that I’m unwilling to give it up for something else. Something better.
Just a year ago, I was begging God for an opportunity to change jobs and he answered that prayer! But, at what point does God’s blessing become an idol that I’m unwilling to let go of? Will I allow my desire to control my circumstances (which is actually impossible) hinder my obedience to God? Am I willing to trust that if God calls Riley and I to a new city, He will be faithful to provide there, like He did here?
My mom spoke some major truth into my life that day. I’m so thankful for her wisdom, encouragement and faithfulness to point me back to Jesus.
Transition is a scary thought, but my God is steady. I can trust Him.
God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us.
Ephesians 3:20 MSG